What's on your mind?

That is the question asked of literally billions of people multiple times a day on facebook. What's on your mind? It's an invitation to share, vent, exclaim, announce, teach, and even grieve. Some choose to share every move they make, even change of socks, every meal, every thought. Some choose to share very little. Some, sadly, just use it to gripe and tear others down.

Social media platforms can be tools to make the world seem smaller and the people we miss feel closer. Friends and family can be reunited and loves rekindled. I love twitter mainly for connecting with people I admire and how fast news spreads. If something happens we need to know about - or even stuff that we really don't need to know about - go to twitter. You'll get information faster than cable news. Unfortunately, these platforms can reveal things about people we thought we knew and love very much that we don't agree with or like very much. It's my belief that real friends and secure people that agree to disagree and move on, but some just enjoy the luxury of hiding behind a computer screen to spew their venom.

We're entering two seasons that are ripe with opportunity to build up or tear down. One is political. One is holiday.

As the presidential election gets closer - and God help us, it's not even 2016 yet -  people seem to get meaner. Not only that but so many fail to check simple fact before posting to social media. I have no problem debating issues or or flat out disagreeing with a candidate or a party line. But one thing I strive to do is 1) never make a friend feel like they are less of a person for having a different opinion, and 2) never making racist or disparaging remarks about a candidate. Every one of the men and women running for President, for the most part, are standing for issues in which they truly believe their position is the right thing for the country they love. I may not agree with them, but I don't think that makes them a bad person. Do I  think Donald Trump is a viable candidate for the highest office in the land? No way. Do I think he's evil? Well, not yet anyway.

We the People are never going to form a more perfect union if we don't talk to each other - and more importantly - listen to one another. Forming an opinion and getting stuck there doesn't help anyone grow or learn. Being willing to open one's mind, listen to differing opinions, and perhaps learning and growing from them, is the only way we are going to continue to progress. And calling everyone from one side of the aisle or the other 'idiots' or 'morons' or 'evil' does nothing for politics, not to mention the harm it causes to relationships. Instead, why don't you ask your different thinking friends and family why they think or vote the way they do and see if you can learn something or, at least, end up in a place of understanding and not anger.

Secondly: the Holidays. This is a busy season of celebration for people of many faiths and backgrounds, and there is room for everyone. Some of this goes back to educating ourselves on the similarities as well as the differences between Christians, Jews, Muslims, and even those who choose to focus on the more secular aspects of the season. Each group has a story they follow as truth. Each group has a right - a RIGHT - to express that story as their tradition dictates. And, even some of those traditions will be open to interpretation based on family and cultural backgrounds, area of the country or the world, and simple personal preference. Real tree or fake tree or no tree at all? Menorah or Muslim prayer cloth? A star or an angel? A baby in a manger, three kings, or a jolly man in a sleigh? There's room for all of it. We all hold on to what we believe is truth and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. It should never close off your brain or your heart or your ability to listen, learn, and experience new things, or even choose a new path.

Of course, it's not just this time of year that we should try to uphold this attitude. Wouldn't it just be nice if it was the norm?  This life is too short and to scary for us to help the bad guys tear each other down. Have a different opinion or a different desire and different interest - that's great. It would be boring if we were all the same. But, encourage each other to embrace the differences, and learn from them. If you just can't do that at least be kind in your disagreement, or perhaps just be quiet.

Build up.
Don't tear down.

Work on  it. I will, too.

It's a coffee cup...

Here we go again.

The commercials have started. The music is already playing on some stations (and they really should be ashamed of themselves...it's November 9). And, now...oh Lord, now...there's a red cup with company logo on it instead of a tree or a nativity scene or a star. Christians are livid. Seriously? It's a coffee cup. 

I know the theories of the date we celebrate Christmas. I know Jesus was likely born in May or March and I know that the date is celebrated around the winter solstice. The retail season has lumped all of the expressions of faith and celebration, (Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah) together and THEY call it the "holidays"  and they have capitalized on that. As a Christian I'm not thrilled with the phrase "Happy Holidays'. I don't say it. If I know someone is Jewish, I will wish them a Happy Hanukkah. If I'm not sure of someone's affiliation I wish them the happiness of the season, or, *gasp, I just say "Merry Christmas". You know what I usually receive in return? "Merry Christmas". Shocking. Remember that phrase wasn't considered offensive until just a few years ago when someone in marketing decided it was. I will admit to getting a little miffed when I hear that a Christmas tree or a star or some other expression of the Christian season cannot be displayed or spoken of but it's acceptable and expected for another faith or no faith at all to have the same right. It's not fair, and it does make me a little bit angry from time to time. 

What it does NOT do is take away the meaning for me. None of society's and retail's so called political correctness changes the fact that what we celebrate on December 25 is Christmas and it's a Christian celebration.   

Let's see Christians get riled up about refugees or hunger or discrimination or homelessness or animal rights or being stewards of the environment or disease or maybe just not treating each other the right way and living the way Jesus expects us to. Let's get loud about things that matter. 

Here's another thought. Just slow down. If you're going to get ready for anything get ready for Thanksgiving. The smells and tastes and family time and counting your blessings. Get ready for that. And, then, take a breath. Light some candles. Embrace the anticipation and holiness and gentleness of the season. The tree really doesn't have to be up before December 1. And every gift doesn't have to come from the mall. You can avoid the parking lot and the lines. It'll be here soon enough, and I can tell you without question that whether or not you kill yourself getting ready for it, the Christ Child will be born again in the hearts of Christians the world over. Frankly, whether you keep it holy and actually enjoy the season is completely up to you. 

Or, you can gripe about a coffee cup. Your choice.

People of good will

Tomorrow we mark 14 years since the attacks. 14 years. While most of us will pause and remember, in the wake of this Syrian refugee tragedy I've been thinking about the way other countries reacted and even assisted those stranded outside the US in the days following the attack. Never in my lifetime have I know the world to feel so small. Because, it wasn't just an attack on America. It was an attack on humanity and people of good will. So when planes were diverted to Canada, the people of tiny towns and big cities came out to feed and shelter and comfort those that couldn't get home because of men and an ideology that had caused pain and fear. Whether it was a hot meal, the playing of our national anthem, the hoisting of a flag, or a place to take a shower or a nap, people came together to help however they could. Now, we are watching a mass exodus of a people who are escaping a horror that we have, thankfully, never known. All they are looking for now is a place to be safe. To know that their children and old ones are safe. And because of money and politics they are not only not being allowed in many countries, but are actually being beaten and treated like a stray dog that no one wants. I don't care about administrations and party and religious differences or ANYTHING other than the fact that these are beautiful, sacred, human lives that are asking for help and a safe place to sleep. It is horrific that this is happening, but even more shameful that the natural order is simply not to open the door and say come in. I don't care who you follow - Jesus, Buddha, Mohammed, the Great Spirit, or the gingerbread man - they are all weeping for this incredibly sad and broken world we call home. If you can do nothing else, pray - to someone or something - for these people. And tomorrow, for the love of all of those men and women of good will, at least for a second...stop...and remember.

Katrina

I love New Orleans. I always have and have loved it more since my sister moved there more than a decade ago. Every morning I put my fleur de lis around my neck - a gift from Jess a few years ago. She said it was because of my love and support of the city especially since Katrina. What a horrific day and night that was. But here's the thing...the levees and the flooding didn't happen until the next day. Meanwhile, the rest of the Gulf Coast - the entire coastline of Mississippi and some of Alabama were devastated. I was 120 miles off the coast, and it was no picnic; no power, separated from my family, dealing with my own anxiety and fear that stemmed that other hurricane: listening to trees snapping outside in the dark and having no idea what direction they were falling. A day or two later when the mall was able to get power, some friends and I went just to have a little AC for a minute. Radio Shack has all of their tv's on. We stood with people - evacuees - and watched the 9th ward fill up with water. I heard people say "i think that's my house". The friends I was with were both clergy and immediately went to work. Shortly after, I stopped by the Methodist church downtown where another friend was the youth minister and that was also a shelter. I walked into the family life center - the gym - and immediately felt like I had stepped into that military hospital scene from "Gone with the Wind" - you know -when Scarlett goes to find the doctor and the camera pans back revealing a sea of bodies. These bodies were not broken and bleeding, but it felt like the same kind of desperation. After a few days of working with the church and the Red Cross I needed to see my family. I went home to Mobile, where Jess still was obviously, and watched my baby sister weep as I stood feeling completely helpless while her city flooded and turned in on itself. A few weeks later Curt and I drove to NOLA to help gather Jess' belongings for storage in Mobile. It took a while to find a gas station with diesel fuel for the moving truck - at least one that was open and didn't have bullet holes in the windows. We were in the city long enough to load the trucks and leave before the sun went down. It took 45 minutes to get back across the twin span. The destruction was evident all the way home. When we got home and the neighbors came out to help unload and asked what it was like, all Curt and I could do was shake our heads. There were no words. The heartbreak was everywhere. Y'all know. We lived it together. And most of us were extremely lucky. But, there are still people who suffer from PTSD and anxiety and haven't regained their lives. So, beyond all the ceremonies and speeches and great things that have happened since then across the gulf coast, I guess I just hope we all remember that there are still folks that suffer. We are still rebuilding. And, it's not all about the Big Easy. It's about us all as humans and as a region. How we fail each other and how we rise up together. Turn off the drama, and hold out a hand. That's how we remember without standing still. That's how we continue to grow.